I hope all of the couples out there had a wonderful Valentine’s Day and had a chance to connect and relax with their spouse! Some people like to go out for a nice dinner and maybe a movie, while other people (me and my wife included) enjoyed a relaxing evening at home. No matter how you spent Valentine’s Day, you are probably wishing that there were more excuses to be able to get a babysitter for the kids and spend some quality time with your mate.

Unfortunately, many couples don’t consider scheduling a regular date night to be a top priority with all the other priorities they have. Or perhaps they do, but their lives are so hectic and busy that it’s difficult to schedule the time. We know that Valentine’s Day is February 14^th, every year. It’s easy to plan for because we know it’s coming and we feel that we “should” spend that day doing something with our spouse, so we do. However, there is little social pressure to plan a regular date night like there is to plan something for Valentine’s Day, so having regular time together often gets lost in the shuffle. This is unfortunate because it’s so crucial to stay connected as a couple. Even if a weekly night isn’t doable because of other demands, every other week is a good place to start. Try new and different things – there are plenty of ideas out there on the internet. An occasional trip to a nice restaurant is great, but not always financially doable. A summer evening spent stargazing or a night where you look at old photographs and reminisce are excellent ideas as well. A great idea, whatever you do, is to implement a “no technology” rule. This wouldn’t apply if you decided to watch a movie together, but setting aside the laptop and phone and focusing 100% of your attention on your spouse lets them know they matter to you.

Many studies have examined the quality of relationships where couples have regular date nights versus those who don’t and have found that the ones who do report a higher level of intimacy and relationship satisfaction. If possible, mark it on the calendar and have it be something to anticipate. The danger with not scheduling it in advance and saying that you’ll find time later is that it won’t happen, or won’t happen with any regularity at least.

Investing time into your marriage, having intentional time together, helps you to build a stonger marriage. Strengthening your marriage and leading and modeling in your home helps you to Build the Home and set your family on a path to Change the World. This is just one of the many ways you can live out St. Paul’s mission statement.

Yours in Christ,
Jarvis

Need any help finding ways to make these changes in your marriage? I’m always here to help – call 217-423-6955 and let’s talk through some ways to make positive change today.